How about: “I like big butts and I cannot lie …”
No. No. That doesn’t quite capture it. How about: “Or shake that thing and talk wit’ your ass, feel me.”
That’s better. Actually a bit accurate. There is a clip where I swear 30 minutes are spent watching a girl walk on a beach with a close shot of her butt. It talks to you.
Her ass jiggled and moved like an ocean wave. That’s deep. But man, I cannot stand Pitbull so forget that lyric. How about this one: “If I could just feel it and touch it, and break it down into numbers …”
Yup, that’s the one. Thank you Ghostface Killah. That’s the lyric that would best describe In The Crack and what it offers its audience: so much analysis of ass and pussy that you feel like you can reach into the screen and grab it.
Which would be awesome. And rapey. After we perfect VR porn, the next step is some super-future technology where you can actually feel everything. Like in Star Trek. I might have made that up.
In The Crack is a quality website with beautiful content focused on butts. Or a beautiful website with quality content focused on butts. Or a quality website with focused content on beautiful butts. I’m so confused.
And pussy! There’s a lot of that. Sometimes nice tits and puffy nipples, but mostly butts. And pussy! Thus a lot of the action is “in the crack.”
Its content is a mix of a lot of things worth liking. There is some general posing in front of cameras, close-ups and insertions, squirting, grool, and the prettiest butts in porn bobbing around the screen. It’s as good of gonzo-style solo action as you’re going to find. I’m assuming I used the word gonzo correctly.
For example, let’s take an In The Crack favorite: Riley Reid. In one collection of content she manages to pose for the cameras and wiggle her cute little butt around, then show off what is described as “a bulging pussy lip sandwich” (hahaha, someone wrote that), and then finishes by emitting some thick grool all over her pussy. That’s a lot to soak in. Literally.
There’s one clip where she squirts all over a hardwood floor and then licks it all up. No, THAT’S a lot to soak in! I don’t even find that to be sexy or anything. My brain didn’t know how to compute it, but my penis was sure it wanted to keep watching.
And on the subject of writing, In The Crack is filled with puns so terrible they are awesome. And terrible. Here are my top 10 clip titles:
- Meat my Bottom Half
- She Anal that Bad
- Jam It Jackson
- Velveeta Tease
- Dick the Holes (it was a Christmas-themed clip)
- Kelly and Cumway
- It’s Nice Under Dare
- Gush Hour Terrific
- Fast and Furry Ass
- Good Moaning Vietnam (that’s racist)
Ya’ll, there is eight years worth of these. There is one person at In The Crack dedicated to coming up with new puns, I swear it. God bless that person. You’re the real MVP.
And back to the subject of bouncing butts, they aren’t necessarily big. Unfortunately. They certainly aren’t small either. Thankfully. They’re more like bubble butts, perfectly shaped and easy to stare. If staring is your thing.
Which is the point: In The Crack is an admiration and admission for liking girls with visually pretty pussy and ass. When it comes to sex (and porn), most of us have a thing. If that thing is an infatuation with a woman’s lower regions, then this is the site for you.
It’s no different than Scoreland offering models with ginormous tits, or We Are Hairy placing its focus on girls who are (predictably) hairy. If there is a certain thing we like, why not give us as much of that thing as possible? And why not do it with well-known pornstars in up to 4K video quality?
Look at some of this year’s lineup: Cherie DeVille, Brittany Shae, Leah Gotti, Candice Dare, Joseline Kelly, Abella Danger. I think those are big names. This isn’t your verified amateur on PornHub (although, that too would be dope). This is the real deal in exclusive action, action we’ve been hoping to see.
In The Crack doesn’t try to be a lot of things. It just wants to be amazing at being one thing: high -quality and up-close action of girls with nice butts playing with, and inserting things in, their cracks. Consider that goal accomplished.
In The Crack’s biggest pro: Aside from the unique content? The picture and video quality. It’s cool to see all the action in clear high-definition.
In The Crack’s biggest con: Too many membership options, so you genuinely get what you pay for. Which is fine if you just want to take a quick peek for $9.95 a month, but disappointing when you find out that your $20 only allows you to stream the videos and not download them. I get that the content producers can command this because there are no parallel competitors, but damn, give us a break.
What could make In The Crack even cooler: More body types and model variety, which is the complaint that comes with just about every solo/lesbian erotic-style site other than Cosmid.net. Understandably, if the focus is on cracks and butts that look a certain way, then most of the models will look a certain way as well. But for booty enthusiasts like myself, we find ourselves making a wishlist of models we would want to see knowing it will probably never happen.